Here’s a quick exercise I want each of you to do. Close your eyes and imagine the most beautiful place you’ve ever been to. A lakeside retreat surrounded by trees and mountains… a tropical setting surrounded by sand, palm trees, and the sound of surf… a Japanese garden or a park in Paris… take your pick, and envision it in your mind.
Then, imagine that there is a hole in the ground right beside you, six feet wide and six feet deep. Look down into that hole, focusing on the vacant space. It’s dark and empty, unfilled and containing nothing. There used to be something there, but it’s gone now, and all that’s left is this pit in the ground.
Here’s a challenge we all face. When we lose something in life, it can be easy to focus on our loss – to get lost down in the holes. We get fixated on the opportunity that slipped past us, the relationship that broke down, and our failures.
We can get obsessed and lose sight of everything else. Remember where we started. – I asked you to envision the most beautiful place you’ve ever been. The mountains and that lakeside retreat, the palm trees and the beach, that garden and the park. We never left that beautiful place; we just shifted our focus down toward that hole – and in doing so, we’re missing out on all the beauty that’s still around us.
I’m sharing this because it’s something I’ve experienced intimately. Amid personal challenges like divorce and losing a job, I’ve had moments where I fixated on what I had lost. There were times when I wasn’t just looking at the hole; I actually crawled down in it. Goodness, beautiful things, and opportunities still surrounded me – I simply focused my attention and energy in the wrong place.
It wasn’t until I shifted my perspective back up and out of those holes that things changed. Looking out and all around me, I saw all the new opportunities. I could see the beauty of the people in my circle and the world around me, and I caught a glimpse of what my future could look like.
I’ve shared in the past the difference between “I have to…” and “I get to…” I’ve also talked about being able to turn your blindside moments into your biggest wins. This is no different. When we encounter the holes in our lives, it’s time to lean into what matters, reflect for a moment on where the hole came from, and then look forward, not backward.
Don’t get stuck in the hole.
The Takeaway
Today, be intentional about where you’re focusing your attention – on the hole or everything surrounding it. What you do with that simple choice will dictate where today leads you.
My goal this year is to continue helping you focus your attention and energy in the right places. With that in mind, subscribe here where I’ll keep sharing challenges like this one to help us all go deep in what really matters! – John
