“I’m driven. I’m a hustler. I just love my work. Slowing down is hard for me.”
I have lived the past twenty years of my professional life using words like those to justify my lifestyle and where I spend my energy. They’ve been a safety net for me, and to be completely transparent, they’re all true. Those words capture accurately what it feels like to be me, my mindset, and how I’m wired. Work is my drug. I love hearing from clients when I’ve impacted their business – it’s a high that I chase.
Like most drugs, this one comes has come with side effects that I am continually trying to offset. Work too hard, and sacrifice your physical health. Work too hard, and surrender your closest relationships. Work too hard, and lose time with friends. Work too hard, and miss out on some of life’s best opportunities.
For everything we say yes to, we say no to something else.
I’ll never not work hard. It’s not in my DNA. Some of you that are reading this may be nodding in agreement. You understand how this feels. Others are shaking your head. It’s just a job. It’s just work, nothing more. You feel bad for me. In the spirit of full transparency, I feel bad for you back. I wish you loved what you do as much as I do. Either way, I know that this is how I’m wired, and I’m also painfully aware that I need to find my balance.
If I don’t find my own version of good, it’s hard for me to help anyone else find theirs.
I’ll be honest. I hate the word “balance.” It’s like trying to find a unicorn. I’m not sure it even exists. It was just the easiest way to put into words what I am chasing. What I do know is this… In the midst of the work and the hustle and the drive, I need to take time to be self-aware and practice some self-care. It’s the only way to maintain peak performance in all I do, from my work to being a husband and a dad.
What does self-aware and self-care look like for me? Here’s a great example. When I’m too busy and not spending time in the gym, slowing down to be self-aware tells me I don’t feel 100%. Physically, I’m sluggish and not as strong, and mentally I’m less sharp. I’m not at peak. Recently realizing this, and being intentional to change it, kicked self-care into action and got me back into regular workouts. The transformation, in a very short amount of time, feels terrific.
The key to this, like almost everything else in life, is being intentional.
I can be self-aware that I need some self-care, but unless that leads to action and change, my best results are never realized. It transcends beyond the gym. It shows up in early morning time set aside for meditation and prayer. It’s in the moments where I turn my phone off, set it aside, and focus my attention on my wife and kids over a dinner, conversation, or games. It’s in the time I spend catching up with friends and clients, listening and checking in on where they’re at.
The Takeaway
This is a daily journey for me. Sometimes it’s easy, and sometimes slowing down is hard. My challenge for myself, and you, is to keep being self-aware. Then follow it with some self-care. As I’ve shared before, sometimes you need to slow down to speed up.